Why are friends in the distance behaving coldly

Social Life: Study Shows When You Lose Your Friends

In times of social media like Facebook everyone has a huge circle of friends and can therefore imagine themselves to be enormously popular. But how many “real” friendships do we really have? Including real exchanges in the café, hours of calling in times of crisis or daily short messages to participate in life across geographical distances?

It should be around 10 to 15 people. Because more honest than any look on social media is one in the call statistics on the mobile phone or in the SMS memory. Here they are: the real social contacts, because who, thanks to uncomplicated chat services, still has the mobile phone number, let alone a landline number?

You want to call in times when a spontaneous call is emotionally overwhelming and you ignore the ringing phone, after all, only your parents, grandparents, siblings, dearest friends, your partner and otherwise maybe the trusted therapist.

American researchers therefore wanted to know how communication behavior has changed in the age of smartphones and short messages. For their study, they evaluated the telephone data of over three million customers of a European telephone company within a year, as reported by the Washington Post newspaper. "Age and gender play a decisive role in maintaining social contacts", write the scientists in the specialist magazine "Royal Society open Science" about their research results.

“Social promiscuity” up to the age of 30

The analyzed telephone data shows that there is a kind of communication arc in every life. Twenty-year-olds indulge in “social promiscuity”, in which the number of social contacts rises to almost 20 people per month, which is the climax of the curve. As soon as the person exceeds the 30 limit, however, the personal network rapidly declines.